poison-ivy-summer-6-14-14-6Over the years, I’ve discovered that playing golf with men has some subtle, yet significant, differences from playing golf with women.   Here’s a few of my observations:

Men spit.  Almost all spitting men are courteous, but once I was walking down the fairway enjoying the scenery when… Bammo!  I was hopping over incoming projectile saliva. Keep an eye out.

If you’re a woman playing with three men and you don’t see one of them, don’t look for him.  He’s in the woods – and he’s not looking for his golf ball.  I found this out the hard way.  “Hey, where’s Bob??”  Oh.

Speaking of woods, there may come a time when even we women might need to use Nature’s Bathroom.   This is already an unpleasant experience, but I have three pieces of advice to make it bearable:

1)  Face uphill – I made this mistake once, it wasn’t pretty,

2)  There isn’t tile but there IS poison ivy – a mistake I haven’t made and don’t intend to.  “Leaves of three, leave them be.”

3) BYOTP.

Lastly, there’s a special, unwritten but universally known rule which covers what a man must do if his drive doesn’t reach the women’s tee box.  I can’t explain it here – this is a Family Friendly blog – but be forewarned.