If you read my blogpost “Butch,” you know that Butch is one of my favorite friends. He’s a good golfer and just an all-around great guy. And, unlike yours truly, he ALWAYS keeps his composure. Also important to this story: Butch is 6’2” and former military.
Last week, we were on a short par 4. After the group in front of us (a twosome – one in his 50’s, one a rather short man of about 75) got onto the green, Butch teed off. Ooops, the hole was a lot shorter than Butch thought because when he striped his tee shot, it rolled onto the green.
It was a mistake for which Butch wanted to apologize, but the 75 year-old went into a rage. SOM, as I’ve come to refer to him (Scary Old Man), started waving his arms frantically and screaming at us. Then he ran (as fast as a 75 year-old can) to his golf cart and started speeding back to our tee box.
We were about to find out just how crazy SOM was.
I was on the Ladies Tee Box, so SOM sped past me on his way to Butch. I’ll never forget the way he looked at me, screaming profanities only Anthony Scaramucci knows. His eyes were wild, his body was stiff with fury. Think “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest.”
Butch, who was on the cartpath with his arms outstretched in a gesture of humility, said “I’m really sorry,” but SOM didn’t even take his foot off the gas. Butch leapt off the cart path, but when SOM was about 10′ from him, he threw a golf ball at him. So Butch had to dodge both the speeding cart and an incoming golf ball.
Wanting to make a second “drive-by,” SOM turned the cart hard. But instead of making a U-turn, he put his cart into a tail spin. What did he do next? He jumped out of the cart – while it was still moving! The cart knocked him in his rear-end so hard he almost fell. He was lucky not to have been seriously injured.
He screamed some more, waved his arms some more, but I think getting hit in the derriere by his own golf cart actually knocked some sense into him — or maybe it was discovering that Butch towered over him by a foot. Either way, SOM went back to his cart and sped away. As he left, he floored the peddle, doing even more damage to the course. The photo is of the damage – yes, that’s a tire track on a green.
Why do I love Butch? Through the entire confrontation, he never raised his voice or lost his composure. In fact, he told me later that when SOM was speeding toward him, his only thought was how to contain an elderly man so he wouldn’t get hurt. One couldn’t find two more diametrically opposed and different men. Thank goodness I’m with the good guy.